Back to School: Managing Stress and Separation Anxiety in Children and Young People
The start of a new school year can bring a mix of excitement and anxiety for children and families alike. For some kids, the return to routine, structure, and friends is something to look forward to. For others, especially younger children or those with a history of anxiety, the transition can be overwhelming.
As a play and creative arts therapist, I’ve worked with many children who find the shift from summer to school particularly challenging. In this post, we’ll explore what separation anxiety looks like, why it happens, and how you can support your child through this transition using gentle, creative, and therapeutic strategies.
Understanding Back-to-School Stress and Separation Anxiety
Separation anxiety is a normal part of development, especially in younger children. It typically appears between 8 months and 3 years old but can resurface during big transitions, like starting school, moving up a year group, or returning after a long break.
For older children and adolescents, stress can show up in other ways: physical complaints (like stomachaches), sleep disruptions, increased irritability, or withdrawal.
Common signs of school-related anxiety:
•Clinging to caregivers at drop-off
•Frequent tears or tantrums before school
•Physical complaints without a medical cause
•Avoidance or refusal to go to school
•Difficulty sleeping or nightmares
How Play and Creative Arts Therapy Can Help
Children often struggle to articulate what they’re feeling, especially when emotions are big or confusing. Play and creative arts therapy creates a safe space where children can express what’s happening internally through storytelling, drawing, sand tray play, movement, or symbolic games.
These approaches help children:
•Make sense of their fears
•Explore school-related scenarios in a low-pressure way
•Strengthen emotional regulation skills
•Build confidence in their ability to cope
The Tools Are Invitations, Not Instructions
Practical Tips for Parents and Caregivers
1. Create Predictability
Children feel more secure when they know what to expect. Use visual schedules, countdowns, or roleplay to walk through what a school day might look like.
2. Validate Their Feelings
Avoid minimizing their emotions. Instead of “There’s nothing to worry about,” try:
“It sounds like you’re feeling nervous about going back to school. That makes a lot of sense. Let’s talk about it together.”
3. Practice Separations Gently
In the weeks leading up to school, schedule short separations (e.g., a playdate or time with a relative) to help children rehearse the experience of being apart and reuniting.
4. Use Transitional Objects
Let your child carry a small comforting item (like a worry stone or a tiny note in their lunchbox) to feel connected to home while at school.
5. Encourage Expression Through Play
Invite your child to draw or role-play their school day using dolls, animals, or figures. This helps externalize their fears in a safe and creative way.
When to Seek Extra Support
If your child’s anxiety doesn’t ease after a few weeks, or if it interferes significantly with daily life, it may be time to seek professional support. A play or creative arts therapist can work with your child to explore these feelings at their own pace, using developmentally appropriate methods to build resilience and coping skills.
Final Thoughts
Transitions can be hard—but with compassion, creativity, and consistency, your child can feel supported and understood. Back-to-school season is an opportunity to build not just academic readiness, but emotional strength.
If you’re concerned about your child’s adjustment or would like to explore how creative therapy could help, I’d be happy to have a conversation. Let’s make this school year one of emotional growth as well as learning.